SO MANY RASCALS
Why
are there so many rascals in the Fraternity, and why don't we turn them
out?" asked the New Brother.
"You remind
me," answered the Old Tiler, "of the recalcitrant witness whom the
prosecuting attorney could not get to answer his questions with a categorical
'yes' or 'no.' 'I can't answer them that way,' the witness protested. 'All
questions can be answered that way!' stormed the prosecuting attorney. 'All
right,' came back the witness, like a flash, 'you answer me this: Have you
stopped beating your wife yet?' Of course the prosecuting attorney couldn't
answer that 'yes' or 'no' without admitting that he did beat his wife. And I
can't answer your question without admitting that there are so many rascals in
the Fraternity, when I know there are not!"
"You know what I
mean!" continued the New Brother. "There are a lot of fellows in
Freemasonry who have no business there. How did they get there and why don't we
turn them out?"
"But do we know
it? I have been tiling this lodge for a great many years. I know every man in
it, many of them personally. I can't call to mind a single rascal. Even when I
think hard I can't remember a single Mason among them all I'd like to see put
out, can you?"
"I sure can! I
know half a dozen I'd like to see out of this lodge!" answered the New
Brother.
"Without telling
me their names, you might mention one or two and tell me what they have done to
you," suggested the Old Tiler.
"I didn't say they
had done anything to me," answered the New Brother. "One man I have in
mind has no business in this organization. He swears horribly. He is tough and
uncouth. He doesn't 'belong.' I'd like to see him out."
"You mean
O'Rourke, the Irishman? Why, man alive, he's one of our prize exhibits! A
protestant Irishman is pretty rare anyhow, and when you have a two-fisted
fighting variety like Paddy you certainly are off on the wrong foot. Suppose he
does swear? Have you no fault which is as bad? Uncouth? What has that got to do
with it? Paddy is there with brotherhood; he'll fight for or nurse you, lend to
you or borrow from you, work for you or with you, just because you both speak
the same language. I can't imagine anyone wanting Paddy out of the lodge."
"I didn't know all
that," the New Brother excused himself. "There is another man; maybe I
can describe him so you won't know him. He is very close with his money and he
doesn't want the lodge to spend money. I don't say he is crooked, although I
have heard stories about his business deals which looked queer. No one ever got
the best of him in a deal. Men like that ought not to be in the great fraternity
we have, which is supposed to be all virtue and open-handed giving."
"You talk like a book that was
scrambled when it was written," retorted the Old Tiler. "I know
perfectly well the man you mean. That's Taylor. I won't defend Taylor's
reputation, because it's not a nice one. Taylor's young wife died when he didn't
have money enough to send her west and ever since he has worshipped money,
because it could have given him the one thing he wanted. Taylor is not a rascal;
he is as honest as you. But he is exceedingly shrewd and he doesn't make any
deals which don't come out his way. As for his not wanting to spend lodge money,
do you?"
"Of course I do."
"Well, there you
are. He doesn't, you do. You do, he doesn't. Neither attitude is rascally; it's
just difference of opinion. He thinks our money should be saved, you think it
should be spent. He is a smarter man than I am, or you are. But none of those
things make him a rascal. In fact, now I think of it, there is only one man in
our lodge who might be put out with benefit to the lodge!"
"I thought you said there were
none!"
"I have just recalled one. He's a
nice enough fellow on the surface, too. Good looking and decent appearing. But
he carries a concealed weapon, which is against the law."
"Why don't you
prefer charges against him?'' asked the New Brother.
''It's not that kind of
a weapon," smiled the Old Tiler. "It's a verbal knife with which he
stabs innocent people in the back. He hasn't very much sense and so he goes off
halfcocked and shoots off his face before he knows what he is talking about. He
sees evil where there is an appearance of evil instead of looking below the
surface. He cannot see the leaves for the trees or the waves because there is so
much water. And he hasn't yet learned several Masonic lessons, such as tolerance
and brotherly love, even though he has been regularly initiated, passed, and
raised. He was Masonicly vaccinated, but the virus didn't take. I don't want to
see the brother put out of the lodge, because there is good in him. I'd rather
see him stay here and learn. But if you really feel that he ought not to be in
our lodge I'll show you how to do something no man in all this lodge has ever
done before."
"I'm afraid I
don't quite understand . . . I'm afraid I do understand . . . I'm afraid . . .
"
"Don't be afraid,
boy. That spoils it all!" cried the Old Tiler. ''If you think this brother
of whom I speak ought not to be among us, prefer charges against yourself. That
will make you a reputation and get rid of a narrow-minded and intolerant Mason.
But if you think this brother can learn, I'm willing to forget I ever heard him
speak of any of his brethren as rascals and . . . "
". . . and try to remember that
even a fool can be cured, if he has an Old Tiler for a doctor!" the New
Brother finished the sentence for him.
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