In the preceding three modules you have been introduced to our overall
problems, you have seen a few of the methods we can use to gain new members and
the concept of candidate care has been examined. This module will deal with two
new concepts that the research revealed were important to men today. Those
concepts are family involvement and community involvement. Each was identified
as an important consideration when deciding to join an organization like
Freemasonry.
Family involvement is easier to adjust to when you realize why it is so
important. The basic family structure has changed, the role of each family
member has changed and the society that surrounds the family has changes.
Many pre-1960 families were based on a single wage earner and a home care
professional, Dad and Mom. The home and the children were Mom's responsibility.
Earning money and keeping up with the world in general were Dad's
responsibility. In general Mom deferred to Dad on such topics as politics,
banking and world events while Dad followed Mom's lead on house rules and child
discipline. The children went to school, did their lessons, went to Sunday
school and played. Play consisted of having fun, with any tool, stick, stone or
twig that was handy. Running through fields, skipping stones or playing with
somebody's old dog occupied a lot of time. Society itself was a slower moving
creature. Instantaneous communication was not to be developed for many years.
Science fiction writers didn't even seriously consider computers and high-speed
modems in every household. It was still possible to have a town meeting without
asking the police to stand by.
In those days of yore it was pretty much Dad's duty to belong to the Lodge.
That's were everybody got together once a month and that's where all the issues
that were issues (with the exception of religion and politics) were discussed.
It was also an acceptable night out with the boys. A man could have a drink,
smoke a few cigars, lose a little pocket change at cards and generally have a
relaxed time among his peers. He could quietly do things to help people without
having to stand up and take a bow for it. An if the whole thing had an aura of
secrecy, well that wasn't a bad thing, because after all, he belonged. It was no
secret to him and it feels good to know something that the next guy doesn't
know.
Today we have problems. The old model family is the exception today instead
of being the rule. A more typical family unit has tow bread winners who both
double as home care professionals. The jobs they hold down are often not careers
but simply a place to earn money. Each may change jobs as many as five or six
times during their working life. All the duties of a home are carried out
jointly during evenings and weekends. The children are no longer simple and
neither is their play. They are exposed to organized sports (where only the best
equipment will do), ballet, band, scouts and guides, church youth group and the
homework is still there but it's not simple any more. Mom and Dad can't help
because half the time they can't understand what's being taught. The demands are
greater from each member of the family unit. If you want to keep up with the
Jones's you'd better be ready to spend some serious money. A requirement for
more money means more training or more effort put into getting a promotion. This
means more time at work, which puts more pressure on the home, which puts the
pressure right on Mom and Dad all day long.
The work, the house and driving the children to all of their pastimes puts an
incredible premium on time. Time is the one-thing today's families cannot find
or buy enough of. Time alone as a family unit is nearly non-existent. You can't
cut back on anything because society and peer pressure tells you that you and
your children must have all these things.
Now the dilemma of the Lodge becomes clear. When we attempt to entice a young
man to join, we are asking him to carve out time from his hurried schedule to
spend with us. First of all, he's not going to join without the rest of the
family unit giving their blessing. He cannot join, attend and be productive in a
Masonic Lodge if every time he goes out the door his spouse begrudges him the
time he is taking away from the family. Therefore as a Masonic Lodge we must
help him to keep her (and the children) happy. This is no mean feat. We need
some skill, tact and diplomacy.
The first thing we need to do, you have already been instructed in (if you
have been reading these modules). We must keep her as well informed as our man
is, right up to the point of initiation. We must answer all of her questions
honestly and openly. She must feel comfortable with us and in general support of
the organization before we start to steal him away.
After we have a man in the organization many believe we can best support his
family by supporting the Eastern Star, Demolay and Rainbow Girls. This is a
noble effort but it will not answer the problem completely.
Our lodge called 20 of its member's wives to find out what programs would be
of the most interest to them. Here is what they found out:
- Lodge dinners were low on the ladies' list as interesting programs
- Special ladies-nights programs developed by the men were virtually no
interest
- Special events where the children were the center of the activity rated
high
- Educational and entertainment programs which involved the whole family
rated highest
- Programs that resulted in New Friendships rated high
- Programs stressing the importance of Freemasonry got no interest at all
This flies against conventional thinking in most Lodges today. Special
ladies-night programs are often the first things a Lodge will try. This
particular lodge took the results of their small survey, formed a team of
younger Masons and created six events, spread over the year, to support family
involvement. The wives were very supportive of the events since the committee
paid attention to points 3, 4 and 5 above when designing their programs.
The committee used things like family picnics, contests with scholarships as
prizes and a holiday, all-day Gala which incorporated some charity work, a
skating party and a dinner with entertainment with everybody involved at every
step. Mixing entertainment and education with the focus on the children seemed
to be the answer.
If we, as a Lodge, create and sponsor events through the Lodge, which allow a
Mason, his wife and his children to be together, to receive some educational
point and to be entertained and have fun, we will be giving them the one thing
they crave the most - quality time together.
The second point of this module is Community Involvement. Many older Masons,
and even a few of the younger Masons, will quickly say, "We are not a service
club." Masonic Renewal is not trying to make masonry a service based
organization. It advocates a certain level of Community Involvement as a
response to some very specific points brought out in the research into man's
motivations. Two important factors which we must deal with are that more than
seventy per cent of the population knows nothing about Freemasonry and men
considering joining an organization like Freemasonry think that having an
opportunity to perform community service is a good motivator for joining. This,
plus the fact that we rely on the community for members and financial support
(after all, who buys our tickets and eats our breakfasts?), should make lodges
much more receptive to the idea of Community Involvement.
Having said that, what types of things are there that the Lodge can do? The
answers to this question are limited only by the imagination and energy of the
members. Some lodges have more resources (money and active Masons) than others.
Obviously if you have the bodies and the money, the sky is the limit. However,
two or three Masons with little or no money, can still be a formidable force. It
takes a few Masons, a little money for paper and postage and some energy to
institute, promote and succeed at a "Mile of Food" program. Using the local
school's running track, you challenge everyone in the community, especially the
other fraternal organizations, to match your member's contributions. Call all
your members and tell them what you are doing and invite them to stay ahead of
the others. Before the day is done everyone will be having a good time, the cans
of food laid end to end will form a very long line (hopefully a mile or more)
and the local food bank will get a generous shot in the arm. The direct benefits
to the lodge are enormous:
most of the town now knows who some of the Masons are
the town now knows that Masons are concerned about people going hungry and
support the food bank
the town now knows that Masons will give time and energy to support the
things they believe in
The Lodge has become known and has started to form a reputation, a good
reputation, based on the energy of three or four Masons and some postage money.
Better still, at least some of the your men of the community saw those Masons
work and asked what was going on. Those young men are forming favorable
impressions of the Fraternity where as yesterday Masons never crossed their
minds.
An active Lodge can support several events like this one during the course of
a year helping different organizations. This spreads the good reputation and the
community contact. Food dives, clothing drives, playground clean ups, meals to
the poor at Thanksgiving or Christmas and helping the elderly with Spring and
Fall chores are all simple one day low cost projects which a few members working
together can succeed at. If you can't get even this much support you can still
make contact with your community by lending your Lodge facilities to worthy
causes like the Christmas Cheer organization. Often groups like the minor hockey
association or the girl guides need a central location to run a fundraiser out
of. They have the bodies and products but they need a large room centrally
located to work from for a single day event. All these events require of the
Lodge is someone to open the door and be available in case a fuse blows or
someone needs a mop and pail.
The book 150 WAYS TO INVOLVE YOUR LODGE WITH THE FAMILY AND IN THE
COMMUNITY has many good ideas for projects divided into categories
according to how much support you can get from the Lodge members. The book
Masonic Philanthropies; A Tradition of Caring by S. Brent Morris, is
also an excellent source of ideas.
Always remember to wear something or post a sign telling everyone that it is
the Masons organizing and running the events. We no longer wish to be quiet. We
don't need to brag or boast but we need the public, especially the male public
over 21 years of age, to see what we are doing and to form an idea of who we
are.
We are and will always be primarily involved with making men better than they
were before. Performing a few services for the community does not diminish or
supercede our prime reason for existence. However, it certainly doesn't hurt our
reputation or our ability to sell ourselves to prospective members, to be
community minded. Combine Family Involvement with Community Involvement, as you
would when cleaning and fixing a playground and the benefits are off the chart.
